Monday Morning Coffee Date | Guest Post: Kris Gray

Cups.  In many ways a women’s life is surrounded by them.  Coffee cups, sippy cups, measuring cups, tea cups, even bra cups.  Our daily lives are surrounded by cups!  And a quote about a cup changed my life.

“As leaders, we are never responsible for filling anyone else’s cup. Our responsibility is to empty ours.”  Andy Stanley


Wow.  Simple, yet mind-blowing.  At first glance it would seem that emptying your cup would automatically result in someone else’s cup being filled.  But it doesn’t work that way…and we get frustrated by that fact and we get offended by that fact, and we get burnt out because of that fact.  Because we WANT to fill everybody’s cup and we want it to make a difference in the lives around us when we empty our own.  We want to change lives and we want people to be better after they’ve been around us and we want…well, we want to be needed.

Because sometimes we get confused about what our job is.  We think WE can solve everybody’s problems.  And we think WE can fix everybody’s hurts.  And we think we have to go on every coffee date and answer every phone call and wipe away every tear.  We start to think that WE are enough.  But we aren’t.  And when we worry more about filling someone else’s cup than we do about emptying our own all we do is make them reliant on us instead of Jesus.

So let the cups free you!  And only worry about your own.  You won’t be able to fill everybody else’s.  You weren’t wired for that and your God has never asked to do that.  But He DID ask you to empty your own.  Use your gifts, your talents, your passions, your time, your money, your story to encourage and strengthen the Body of Christ.  That’s what emptying your cup looks like.  But you can only empty your own.

“If it is possible, as far is depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”  Romans 12:18

Did you catch that middle part?  As far as it depends on you.  Sounds a lot like not worrying about filling anyone else’s cup and worrying a whole bunch about how we’re emptying our own.  And that’s my challenge for us as we start this new year.  We can’t fill everyone else’s cup, and we can’t fill any one person’s cup completely.  That’s a job for our Savior.  But what we CAN do is make sure we’re emptying our own with faithfulness, excellence, godliness, and love.

Doing what depends on us and then letting it go if it’s not enough.  Doing what God’s asked us to do and then leaving the results to Him.  Emptying our cup and being ok if it doesn’t fill up someone else’s.  As far as it depends on you.

So here’s to being a network of women whose cups are empty!  Some of the cups around us might not be all the way filled, but we’re gonna be ok with that.  Well, except for maybe those sippy cups…



NWYouthLT.Jan2015 (16 of 20)

Kris is a wife to 1 fireman, a mom to 3 teenagers and the youth pastor to 100 kids. She is an avid Packer fan, addicted to scrapbooking, and passionate about helping teenagers live beyond normal.

Amber has been married to her best friend, Tyler, for 14 years. Together they have three beautiful (not so little anymore) biological babies and one foster babe. Their life mission is to make Jesus famous. Amber is crazy about her family, coffee, running, and the Seattle Seahawks. Her passion is to live simply and healthy, and make everything around her more beautiful and more productive.

Leave a Reply


captcha *