18 WAYS TO EXPERIENCE BLESSING IN YOUR MARRIAGE (THOUGHTS FROM OUR 18TH ANNIVERSARY)

Tyler and I just celebrated our 18th wedding anniversary! Though we have had plenty of highs and lows, we wanted to share some thoughts that could bless others in their journey through marriage.

To give you a little backdrop to understand where we are coming from (AND to spare you from the idea that life has been simple, easy or like something you would see on an instagram influencers page…), these 18 years have included: three kids, 9 moves, 4 dogs, the joy and the journey of foster care, navigating Type 1 Diabetes (Tyler) and a rare vocal cord diagnosis (Amber), multiple half marathons, beautiful moments of ministry and church leadership, painful and heartbreaking moments of ministry and church leadership, moments of “how are we going to make it through this…”, and a whole lot of coffee.

Here are 18 ways to experience blessing in your marriage as we reflect on our past 18 years.

ONE

GIVE WHAT YOU WANT TO RECEIVE

TWO

SAY THANK YOU

THREE

MAKE EACH OTHER FEEL SPECIAL

FOUR

DO WHAT BUILDS TRUST INSTEAD OF WHAT DEPLETES IT

FIVE

LAUGH TOGETHER EVERY DAY

SIX

DON’T GO TO BED MAD

SEVEN

REGULARLY DO SOMETHING PHYSICAL TOGETHER (FEEL FREE TO READ THAT HOWEVER YOU WANT)

EIGHT

CREATE MOMENTS — BECAUSE MOMENTS MAKE MEMORIES

NINE

OUT-SERVE AND OUT-BLESS ONE ANOTHER

TEN

“SPEAK LIFE” TO EACH OTHER AND ABOUT EACH OTHER

ELEVEN

CHEER LOUDER FOR YOUR SPOUSE THAN THEIR FANS OR THEIR CRITICS

TWELVE

BE WILLING TO BE “INCONVENIENCED” — JUST DON’T ACT LIKE YOU ARE

THIRTEEN

INVEST IN YOUR FAITH INDIVIDUALLY AND TOGETHER

FOURTEEN

GET ON THE SAME PAGE AND FIGHT TO STAY THERE (CHURCH, FINANCES, TIME, GOALS, KIDS, ETC.)

FIFTEEN

INVITE TRUSTED VOICES TO SPEAK INTO YOUR RELATIONSHIP (NOT JUST WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR, BUT NEED TO HEAR)

SIXTEEN

DREAM TOGETHER AND SET GOALS TOGETHER

SEVENTEEN

KEEP DATING (YOU CAN DO THIS EVEN WITHOUT A LOT — WE WERE YOUTH PASTORS WITH 3 KIDS 3 YEARS OLD AND YOUNGER…)

EIGHTEEN

FIGHT NICE (KEEP READING AND GROWING IN YOUR COMMUNICATION SKILLS — AND REMEMBER THE GOAL ISN’T TO WIN, BECAUSE YOU CAN “WIN” AN ARGUMENT AND STILL LOSE IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP)

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU! WHAT OTHER IDEAS AND THOUGHTS WOULD YOU ADD TO THIS LIST TO EXPERIENCE BLESSING IN MARRIAGE?

ADD YOUR COMMENTS IN THE SECTION BELOW!